Disturbed Attachments

Every other day I hear stories filled with pain and agony which ultimately led to a total wreckage of a marriage. Every story is similar to the other in every sense and the only difference is it's intensity of creating a havoc. While some part smoothly, the other part with arguments while still many more part with heavy burdens of abuse and torture. It's become very normal to hear about a divorce or separation. And people stop for a while, gossip till they have had enough and move on with their lives. It's a norm of our modern day living.
Unfortunately, we live in a culture which normalises a trend of extravagance in weddings and stigmatises the same couple, more so a woman when they are having a difficult time in their marriage. It's also too common to see  a couple preparing to look best in their wedding outfit and do everything in their power to be able to showcase a best possible outward self on the D-day of their wedding, but unfortunately they turn out to be poorly prepared for the very idea of a marriage. It's really a task to be able to stay together in the downs and ups of life. It's a humongous ability to actually live with each other's faults and shortcomings. It's really important to understand that a wedding is totally different than the concept of marriage.

Unfortunately a couple who has spent their pre-marital time in grooming their outward self will have a hard time putting up a smiling face every morning after the gala of an initial honeymoon period.
To avoid being tied up in the shackles of an unhappy marriage, it's important to understand the concept of being empathetic. It's integral to have a basic sense of marital manners and ethics. It's important to keep in mind that a happy marriage is not about having a lavish lifestyle and abundance of resources. If only we keep in mind that a contended marriage is all about having mutual trust and respect for the other. A peaceful marriage only demands a forgiving and a compromising attitude. Forgiveness and tenderness are the soul and spirit of a harmonious relationship.

 It's more important for a couple to keep investing in a relationship. To invest unexpected love care affection and mercy. To be forgiving and loving and compassionate. To be soft and tender with each other. To look out for each other. To be a source of strength and courage to each other. And that happens when both of them invest all the time and energy into it. But without any expectations. Without having a thought that if I do this he'll do this for me or she'll do this for me.

We need to understand that he's the man for whom my hands in prayer raise to make duas for. He's the man whom I think of giving back infinite happiness. So when I do even a biggest or even a tiniest action for him, I do it for the pure fact that he's the man I purely love without any conditions attached. While the menfolk need to imprint the fact in their minds that my wife is my better half and to her belongs my loyalty and support. She is the primary owner of my love and mercy. She is the woman to whom my forgiveness knows no bounds. Husbands need to expand their hearts and souls for her and constrict their egos and rise together in love and harmony.

*Whether your better half is giving you what you deserve or not, you be the one who's always showing up for. You be the one who becomes an epitome of compassion. You be the one who's giving and not waiting to be received. And when this cycle keeps continuing than your little world of marriage will stand tall and strong even in the face of storms and many tests of time♥*


It's really sad that we invest money in business, we invest time for our jobs, we invest our energy for our goals.

*but do we really invest ourselves for our relationships with our loved ones i.e our spouses, parents, siblings or do we just sit back and expect for the other person to spread a hand of love?*

Life is indeed too short to live in misery and doom. In the little we have, we need to fill our hearts with gratitude and save our boats of marriage from being disturbed and destroyed. We need to safeguard our attachments with care, compassion and consideration.

- sufiaque.